Thursday, February 27, 2014

Today

by Sonja Aiken Struthers

Today I stand in the shower and watch the water
Run down the wreckage that is my body
A body that four months ago was still me

Today I do not know the person in the mirror
There is nothing left there that I recognize

Today I sit to dry what is left of my hair
And wonder why…
The drugs and my Moriarty will take this as well

Today I look at the face of my husband and I am torn between overwhelming guilt and gratitude
So pale…dark shadows beneath his eyes; belying the cheerful voice and fear I know fills his heart
Trying to do everything while assuring me it is not too much, the cost not too high

I weep because I know that it is

Today I went outside into my garden to trim the dead flowers from my roses
Desperate for a sense of normalcy
Hoping I will see them bloom again

Today my beautiful dogs lay their noble heads in my lap to comfort me
My steadfast guardians
They lick the tears from my face and know I am still Mom

Today I consider my options
Hope is elsewhere

Today, I am not brave

©Sonja L. Struthers 7.29.13


3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I may be in grade 6 and I may not understand all the big words but this poem really touched me. I think you're very talented! Keep writing poems! :)

Anonymous said...

I may only be in grade 6 and I may not understand other poems but this one really touched me. It made me feel and think about everything. Keep following your dreams because in the end it's worth it! :)

Alexis

Unknown said...

Your poem is beautiful and touching. Keep following your dreams, its worth it, I promise. I love you so very much :)have a great day! xoxo isha